Recently I was speaking with someone about the root causes of fibromyalgia who used to suffer from the condition in the past and studied it as well. She confided in me that she felt like much of the pain and fatigue developed from not living in alignment with one’s true self.
I have to admit that the idea had crossed my mind before as well. Like some part of me might know that I am headed on a road that is ultimately not who I truly am, even though I may not be consciously aware of it. And it is kicking and screaming, trying to get my attention – through the FM symptoms – to get me off that track. It is forcing me to pause, and do some soul-searching to find what it is that I should be doing that is indeed in alignment with my authentic self.
Presumably, once one reconciles their actions with their true identity, the symptoms improve. That is what, I got the impression, she believes happened with her. She also cited life stories of several people she studied with FM – many with high-achiever, goal-oriented personalities and fast-paced lifestyles (stories similar to mine) – who switched career tracks as a result of FM and now are doing much better. Plus they are now much happier.
Of course, one might view the data completely “non-spiritually.” You get ill. You realize your current lifestyle is not conducive to your feeling better. So you make the difficult choice of changing it to something that bodes better with your current state of health. And lo and behold, minus the added stress and pushing past the limits, you start to feel better! This is, of course, the very premise of pacing! And who wouldn’t feel happier if they got off the FM roller-coaster?
While I have nothing against the sort-of spiritual way of thinking about the condition, I cannot but feel like it is a bit too close to the “it’s all in your head” dismissal that so many of us have heard so often. I know, though, that it is not how she meant it. She is well aware of the stigma attached with invisible illnesses. But I still bristle at the thought of how there is so much more open room for interpretation and/or conjecture with conditions like FM, which cannot be tracked to a particular cause (yet), than other illnesses with more definitive causes.
Regardless, I can certainly see the merits of her spiritual way of viewing the world. I imagine it goes a longer way towards promoting acceptance and and sustainable changes in lifestyle than a purely medical train of thought. You may feel less indignant, or like you’ve been dealt an unfair hand, if you think that it is your unconscious mind that is using FM to steer you towards the right path. This way, you might resist less in making the changes necessary for your well-being.
But once one is past that stage, I am afraid that there is a lot this worldview alone cannot fix. It is the same issue that I have with positive thinking. Positive thinking in the form of cognitive behavioral therapy can be beneficial in helping one come to terms with their condition and not make their pain worse due to catastrophizing. But beyond that, no amount of positive thinking can cure FM any more than they can cure a tumor. Likewise, I doubt authentic living could necessarily get rid of my flares due to period or bad weather.
However, none of this is to say that we should not try and make the best of the situation and do some soul-searching. Whether or not it can cure FM, chances are that a balanced, fulfilling life can only really be cultivated if it is in alignment with one’s authentic self.
Now more than ever, as I stand at a transition phase, I keep thinking of what kinds of paths would appeal to my true nature. Despite the subject being a recurring motif with me, I have been giving it a lot more thought after developing FM, since I was forced to turn off the auto-pilot and take the gears of life back into my own hands. I do believe that finding and living in accordance with my true self will bring a measure of happiness and inner peace that I often lack now. And if my fibromyalgia improves with it too – well, I’ll just consider that a bonus!
Gentle hugs,
Fibronacci
Pain(t)h.D. 